While the stars still shone like sharp white points above the tent where the sleeping Isaac lay, and long before the gray dawn had begun to lighten the east, the old saint had made up his mind. He would offer his son as God had directed him to do, and then trust God to raise him from the dead. This, says the writer to the Hebrews, was the solution his aching heart found sometime in the dark night, and he rose "early in the morning" to carry out the plan. It is beautiful to see that, while he erred as to God's method, he had correctly sensed the secret of His great heart.
A. W. Tozer "The Pursuit of God"
This statement speaks loudly to my heart. Many times, I have "erred as to God's method," but I know, that I know, that I know that I have "correctly sensed the secret of His great heart." It's not easy to walk in the prophetic light of the Gospel of Jesus Christ as revealed to us by the Holy Spirit. Yet, we are no different from the saints and prophets of old. Many of them were ridiculed, beaten, imprisoned, wrongly accused, and banished for speaking the word of the Lord at the direction of the Spirit. Of course, they being men, didn't always know the exact methods God would use to fulfill the words He had given them, nor the time frame in which they would occur. Furthermore, those who heard them, being men, didn't really like some of the hard things they were saying.
Sure, it would be nice if God just laid out every single detail for us and the timeline for their occurrence, but He doesn't. We must live the life of faith, and we must speak and act upon the words the Lord gives us with faith even when we don't know the methods He will use to fulfill them or when He will fulfill them.
You may be like me, having times that you "erred as to God's method" but "correctly sensed the secret of His great heart." Don't beat yourself up! Believe me, there will be plenty of others that will do it for you. Haha! Seriously, though, you are seeking after the heart of God, and He will make His heart known to you. The more "experience" you get with hearing Him and responding in faith to His words to you, the more accurate and efficient you will get at understanding Him. You will begin to recognize His voice and urgings more clearly and build more faith to trust Him to all the details. You will learn that there are times to stand and see the Lord's hand at work for you, and that there are times that you must step out in faith even when you are not quite certain of where you are going, you only know the direction.
I want you to trust your relationship with the Lord. If you draw close to Him, He will draw close to you. He will never lead you astray or do you any harm. Listen to Him. Respond to Him. Obey Him. It doesn't matter if you've done something wrong or said something wrong in the past. Today, you can hear from Him again, and today, you need to trust Him to help you respond and obey completely and correctly. And even if you mess up again, He'll be there to rescue you. He won't beat you over the head with an iron rod. He'll pick you up, and you'll try again.
Scriptures for reference and study: Genesis 22; Hebrews 10:38; Hebrews 11:6; John 10:4, 27; Philippians 1:6; 1 Corinthians 16:13; Ephesians 6:10, 13; Genesis 12:1-4; James 4:8; Micah 7:8-9
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